Thank You
by LadyLaura11
Summary: Post Cops and Robbers oneshot. Castle and Beckett find themselves having a conversation after Alexis and Martha have gone to bed.


_I saw you  
>I saw you<br>I saw everything in motion  
>I saw why it's left unspoken<br>_Too Deep – J Mascis 

Alexis and Martha have since retired to bed, the remnants of the night's dinner still sitting on the dinner table. The day's events have left everyone too tired to do any cleaning. Beckett leans against the kitchen counter, wine glass still in hand.

"I still say I have saved your life more times than you've saved mine." Castle refills their glasses of wine, grinning at her. He leaves the kitchen and walks into the living room, sitting down on the couch.

Beckett follows suit. She raises an eyebrow at him. "Do not even give me that, Castle." But she knows he is right. He has been there for her so many times she can't even count.

"The bomb in your apartment. The bomb that almost blew up Manhattan. Keeping you warm in that freezer? Need I say more?"

"Castle, we've already been over this," Beckett says. She takes a sip of her wine. "It's only right that I returned the favor today, given…what happened."

Castle's face suddenly turns serious. "Kate."

"I never thanked you for pulling me away in the hangar that night, Castle." They haven't discussed the events of the hangar since that day she woke up in the hospital.

The look in Castle's eyes tell her there is nothing more that she needs to say.

Beckett changes the subject to all the paperwork she and Castle will have to do in the morning. He makes a crack about how Ryan and Esposito never do any paperwork. She rolls her eyes at him, and soon they are back to the Castle and Beckett banter that they both enjoy.

She's in the middle of a story about the time she and Esposito spilled beer all over a very important piece of paperwork when she notices that Castle hasn't said anything in a good two or three minutes. His head is a bit slumped to the side. He has fallen asleep.

Castle breathes in and out, his chest rising and falling ever so slightly.

As Beckett watches him sleep, she thinks about the fact that if circumstances had been different today, she would have never seen him again.

If those bank robbers had decided to blow up the hostages instead of themselves, she would have never had the chance to sit down to dinner with Castle and his family tonight, sharing laughter and relief. She would have had to face Alexis with the news, trying to stay strong and hold back her tears.

She would have never been able to tell him the truth, the truth she had kept from him all this time since the shooting.

"Kate, I love you. I love you, Kate." She heard those whispered words in her head now and wished that she had the courage to tell Castle that she remembered everything that had happened that day. She remembered his panic-stricken face hovering above her as she gasped for air. She remembered his hands gripping her arm and the back of her neck, protecting her with his body. And then those words. And everything went black around her.

"I remember everything," she'd told her therapist. Why was it so much easier to recount everything to a stranger than to tell the man that she cared for so deeply that she had feelings for him? That was the answer. It was easier. Letting Castle know how she truly felt was hard.

Love was hard.

Beckett reaches over and smoothes Castle's shirt collar, the same gesture she'd given him earlier after finding him in the remnants of the bank. In that moment, she couldn't help but smile when she knew he was all right and had not died in the explosion. She'd let her happiness take over, and if it hadn't been for Martha's interruption, she probably would have kissed him from relief.

Now, Beckett has the opportunity to give in. She stands up, careful not to make any noise, and leans over his sleeping form. "Thank you," she whispers and places a gentle, lingering kiss on his forehead.

Her whispered "thank you" is full of so many unspoken words. _Thank you for being my laughter. Thank you for being my partner. Thank you for being my rock._

_Thank you for being the one person that will eventually break through my walls. And who already has._

_Thank you for not giving up on me._

Beckett looks at Castle one last time and then quietly walks toward the door to the loft. She puts her hand on the doorknob and looking back to see if he's woken up, pulls the door open.

Meanwhile, on the couch, Castle opens his eyes as Beckett slowly slips out the door. He feels the ghost of her kiss on his forehead and touches it, a tiny smile forming on his face. "You're welcome," he says and closes his eyes again, letting sleep take over.

**How about that Cops and Robbers episode, eh? I hope this made sense. The episode inspired me to write and when I'm inspired, I just have to get it written down. This is what came out of my rambled thoughts after watching the episode.**

**Thanks to Lily and Joe for being my betas, despite the fact that everything I say amuses them. LoePro, I love you both. **

**I am crossing my fingers with the rest of the Castle fandom that Castle finally breaks through Beckett's wall this season & that she lets him know that. When that happens, I think we will all be speaking excitedly from the grave. **

**Andrew Marlowe is a genius. That is all.**


End file.
